Tis the season of giving, but giving what?

"Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love."

~ Lao Tzu

I love that we've all embraced that it's the thought that counts, and that it's better to give than to receive.  I think, though, we're only part way to finishing that thought.

What are we giving?  More stuff, right?  We're giving toys, clothes, books, gadgets, technology, and all manner of paraphernalia.  In our eagerness to make other people happy with all our giving-ness, we're still making it all about the stuff. 

This season's top sellers for adults are TVs and computer tablets, according to the Associated Press.  For kids, the National Retail Federation says that barbies, video games, and iPods are hot-ticket items.  China must be so very happy with us.

Who are we giving to?  Family, friends, maybe some co-workers, maybe some of our kids' teachers?  That's great, that's important, but that keeps our circle of giving pretty small, doesn't it?  What are we giving to that stranger in the check-out line in front of us, or to woman struggling with her weepy toddler at the library, or that guy driving next to us on the highway?

Can we extend giving to them?

I'm not talking about buying the clerk at 7-11 at TV.  I'm not talking about spending more, or taking more precious time out of our busy schedules, or exerting much energy at all.  But we can give of more ourselves, through generosity of spirit and attitude.  We can do little things that send the message that it's just not about us and ours - it's about all of us.

I'm not even talking about Random Acts of Kindness - although I'm all for those, too.  I'm talking about Kindness, period.

• Let that other car in front of you on the highway - you are not Mario Andretti
• Let the person with three items go ahead of your loaded cart at the grocery store
• Smile at the people you pass on the street
• Look people in the eye
• Thank people for anything you can thank them for
• Hold open a door
• Give compliments
• Ask if you can help
• Forgive someone
• Forgive yourself
• Shovel the neighbors sidewalk
• Hell, shovel your own sidewalk - the mail-person will appreciate it
• Don't flip off the person who is inevitably going to cut you off on the highway
• Don't ride their bumper, either.  Let them go.
• Write a thank you note
• Find someone with absolutely no fashion sense whatsoever and compliment their outfit
• Read your kids an extra book at bedtime
• Leave a good tip
• Give your seat to someone who looks like they need it
• Don't gossip
• Take the time to let little kids pet your dog (insert disclaimer about nice dogs here)
• Put your phone away during meals
• Call your mom (my own mom is rolling her eyes right now, because I don't call her nearly enough)
• Make extra Christmas cookies and drop them off at the teacher's lounge
• Get there on time
• Stop for pedestrians
• Give the janitor a Christmas/Holiday gift
• Say "bless you" and offer a tissue
• Don't pretend you don't see that person looking for a seat on the train  or bus - move your stuff
• Say "hello" and "goodbye"
• Think about the Golden Rule

I'm sure there's a lot more we can add to the list.  Feel free to drop off suggestions in the comments.  And go ahead and buy that stuff - it's one of the few times that we can indulge each other's more materialistic wishes, and it's fun.  But in the process of obtaining that stuff, let's all try to be nice.

Comments

[Wife and Mommy]

I love this list, dear friend. Something I will be looking about, for sure. xoxo

[Uggs on Sale]

Give the janitor a Christmas/Holiday gift
Say "bless you" and offer a tissue
Don't pretend you don't see that person looking for a seat on the train or bus - move your stuff
Say "hello" and "goodbye"
Think about the Golden Rule
I'm sure there's a lot more we can add to the list. Feel free to drop off suggestions in the comments. And go ahead and buy that stuff - it's one of the few times that we can indulge