A Merit Badge in Discrimination?

"Homosexuality is not a moral deviance, bigotry is."

~Christopher Baker, AIA, PE, MBA 
Former Senior Patrol Leader of Troop 261

My eight-year-old son finished his first year of Boy Scouts this June.  He's adorable in his little Tiger Scout outfit with the orange scarf, badges, beads, and pins.  He took great pride in his pinewood derby car, his rocket, and his den's soap box derby car.  He attended meetings, learned oaths, and pledged that he will do his best; I'm pretty sure he enjoyed it all.  

He's leaving the BSA, though, on his own accord, because of the BSA's discriminatory stance on homosexuals.  If you've been under a rock for the past few weeks (no judgements here, I am frequently under rocks when it comes to big news stories) you may have missed it, but the BSA announced last week that after a confidential two-year review, the Boy Scouts of America has reaffirmed its policy of excluding gays.

My facebook feed is clogged with links and posts expressing outrage at the BSA policy.  Petitions have been started to reinstate ousted den leaders, parents are vowing to never join, and Eagle Scouts are sending back their medals.  The only arguments I've heard in favor of sticking with the BSA is that it's such a great experience for the kids, and that change can come from within.

I wonder if a more realistic argument for keeping kids in the BSA is that parents don't want to deal with explaining why they should no longer participate, that they've already made the investment of time and money, and that the discriminatory policy doesn't really affect their daily scouting lives.

I've tried to see this from a “change from within” perspective, and I've taken into consideration the assumption, based on my experience, that our local pack is tolerant and inclusive. All things considered, however, I have come to the conclusion that I can no longer send money to, participate in, or ask my child to respect an organization that excludes anyone based on religious belief or sexual orientation. My reasons are as follows:

• I would never, ever, patronize an establishment that had a “No Gays” sign on the door.

• I would never knowingly donate money or purchase products from such an organization or business. Goodbye, Boy Scout popcorn!

• I find the BSA to be at hypocritical odds with the Christian faith they purport to adhere to. I was under the assumption that Christians follow the teachings of Jesus Christ, and that he taught acceptance, love, and inclusion. In a day of “WWJD” t-shirts, I'm pretty sure that Jesus Christ would not support the BSA right now.

• The hypocrisy isn't limited to a conflict with Christian belief.  Bob Mazzuca and Wayne Perry, chief scout executive and national president of the Boy Scouts of America, wrote an opinion piece in the July 17, 2012 edition of the New York Times. In part, they wrote, "And we teach our members to treat those with different opinions with courtesy and respect at all times and to adamantly oppose the mistreatment of others based on any perceived difference." How can they adamantly oppose the mistreatment of others based on perceived differences if they are mistreating those with perceived differences in their organization?

Despite the buzz that this issue has created among me and my grown-up friends, I suspect that few people are discussing this with their kids. I'm sure we all have our reasons, but to be truthful, it was probably only cowardice that kept me from discussing this with my son.  It's one thing for me to decide that we're done with the Scouts, but it seemed wrong to not ask my son for his opionion. When I did sit down and talk to my son about this issue, openly and honestly, I was rewarded with an open, honest response.

I explained that the BSA does not allow some people to participate in their organization based on the way they were born. I compared it to disallowing people based on the color of their eyes, or their skin.  We discussed what it means to be gay, and my son took this in in the spirit in which I presented it: that it's natural.  At the end of our conversation I asked him to take some time to think about whether or not he would like to stay in BSA. He said he didn't need to; he thinks that the policy is “cruel,” that he has “plenty of other fun things to do,” and doesn't want to be in Scouts anymore if they aren't allowing everyone to join. 

True to his pledge, my son is doing his best.